Rate the instructions: How to make a Camera Lucida

In general, we think that the instruction “How to make a Camera Lucida” cannot be considered as very helpful. There are certain positive aspects but the negative ones are predominant. First of all, the heading of the instruction is misleading because it only mentions how to build a Camera Lucida but not how to draw with it which is explained in the second paragraph. Therefore the heading should be changed into “ How to make a Camera Lucida and how to draw with it”. The structure of the two paragraphs which divide the instruction into two parts is confusing.  The first paragraph contains too much information and, therefore, should be split into three smaller steps. Besides, the first four pictures should be placed directly next to the corresponding steps. The second paragraph is even more confusing as it skips important information. It should also be divided into several steps which should explain how to build the frame where the camera lucida is fixed on. Further, the recommendation of David Hockney is embedded in the text  and can be easily overlooked. It should be added separately so that it can clearly be seen that it is a hint. Apart from the confusing structure, a list of the material needed is missing which should be added right at the beginning. However, we believe that the pictures are useful as they contain a lot of important information for example the measurements of the card, the piece of plastic and the frame. For us, this is the only positive aspect. It would be difficult for us to build and use a camera lucida with this instruction.

[271 words]

Project Blog Post: compare two polaroids

advertisement 1

advertisement 2

The two advertisements which are compared in the following paragraph basically show the same structure: a picture with a text beneath it. The most apparent difference is the fact that the first one is in black-and-white and the second one is coloured. Although a Polaroid Land Camera can be seen in both pictures they do not present the same model.  While the one in the black-and-white ad is clearly an older version because of its unwieldy size, the other one is much more compact. Besides, the older camera prints the photos on top, whereas the newer version prints them at the bottom. Furthermore, the settings of the two pictures are completely different. The first  one shows a man wearing a hat and a suit looking fascinated at the old polaroid camera which is displayed in a shop window.  In the background, a lot of other people are walking down the street. In contrast, the second ad only shows the polaroid camera from the front on a plain white background which represents the idea that less is more to draw the attention of the potential customer only on the camera.  Apart from these visual differences, also the texts beneath both pictures extol the Polaroid Land Camera in  a completely different way. The text of the older ad is instructional as it uses a lot of imperatives to encourage the reader to go and get the camera which the title already indicates. Further, the text appeals more to men than to women as the ad was published in 1956, a  time where men earned money as head of the family and were in control of the spendings. The second text addresses a problem of modern society: the loss of privacy. Therefore, it praises the polaroid camera as being the only trustworthy way of keeping your pictures safe. Generally, it can be said that both ads have very little similarities as they have been created and published in different periods.

[327]

peer feedback:

1.) The group members that reviewed our text said that a couple of our sentences were too long.

2.) Further, they criticised that our text contained too many linking words.

3.) They said that we should refer directly to the NSA-scandal which we think is not necessary as we think that the ad does not explicitly refer to that particular case. For us, it refers to the problem of the loss of privacy in general.

4.) They also did not like the structure of our text but they liked our content. However, we decided to stick to our original structure because we think in terms of logos our text is fine.

 Final Version:

The two advertisements which are compared in the following paragraph basically show the same structure: a picture with a text beneath it. The most apparent difference is the fact that the first one is in black-and-white and the second one is coloured. Although a Polaroid Land Camera can be seen in both pictures they do not present the same model.  The one in the black-and-white ad is an older version and is of an unwieldy size. The other camera is a more recent model and is much more compact due to its smaller size. Besides, the older camera prints the photos on top, whereas the newer version prints them at the bottom. The settings of the two pictures are completely different. The first  one shows a man wearing a hat and a suit looking fascinated at the old polaroid camera which is displayed in a shop window.  In the background, several people are walking down the street. The second ad shows the polaroid camera from the front on a plain white background. This represents the idea that less is more and draws the attention of the potential customer only on the camera.  Apart from these visual differences, the texts beneath both pictures extol the Polaroid Land Camera in  a completely different way. The text of the older ad is instructional as it uses a lot of imperatives to encourage the reader to go and get the camera which the title already indicates. Further, the text appeals more to men than to women as the ad was published in 1956, a  time where men were seen as head of the family and in control of the spendings. The second text addresses a problem of modern society: the loss of privacy. It praises the polaroid camera as being the only trustworthy way of keeping your pictures safe. Generally, it can be said that both ads have very little similarities as they have been created and published in different periods.
[327 words]

Project Blog Post - Napalm Girl

http://sharemarysword.blogspot.co.at/2014/04/project-blog-post-2-napalm-girl.html